Parenting from the Heart

Can children learn social sensitivity from dogs? Fourth-grade teacher Amy Weinstein sees heartening evidence in her class that they do. Her dog, Pete, who just returned to school in the middle of taking a social-skills class, was welcomed back with tenderness and love from her students. Over the year, the children have become familiar with Pete’s needs and his history. When Amy adopted him, he had been physically hurt by an “insensitive human,” and the students know that as a

My favorite story about catching oneself in a lie happened at school. I was eating lunch in a classroom when a five-year-old spotted a chocolate chip cookie on the floor and picked it up, eagerly holding it next to her lips. “Is that yours?” I asked. “Yes,” she responded eagerly. Then she paused, and it seemed as if a shadow fell across her heart. She quickly smiled and said “Just kidding” apologetically and put the cookie back on the table. I could identify with her dilemma.

Games often have strict rules about getting things right the first time. For example, the rules of Scrabble state that you can’t change your mind once you lift your hand off a tile placed on the board. In kickball there are no re-kicks, or “mulligans,” for a missed kick or bad play. Once the ball is kicked, the play is considered live. Of course, sometimes people playing games agree to let others have another turn. However, in ordinary life being able to have a second chance,

A clever father found a way to boost his son’s feelings of self-worth during a time of family transition. He purposely spoke on the phone in front of his son, listing the ways he was being a great big brother to their new baby. Sometimes he even pretended to make a call even though there was no one on the line, talking enthusiastically about his son’s amazing new brotherly behavior. This empathic dad intuited that overheard conversations often make more of an impression on ch

At a storytelling conference, my friend told the tale of trying to write a thank-you note as a child for an unexciting holiday gift: socks. It’s hard to feel gratitude when it’s obligatory. It can be more fun to ignite thankfulness by spontaneously thinking of people in our lives who help us in ways we might not usually honor. For example, the school gives little gifts to our delivery people every year. At this time of year, I’d like to share my gratitude for people who do th

When we’re trying to teach children to relate to others in empathic and considerate ways, it’s exciting to think about a neurological concept called social-emotional matching. Matching is a way that our brains synchronize with others’, and it happens all the time. When a friend or colleague shares an upset, we show empathy through eye contact and sympathetic facial expressions. Our ability to align with their emotions is part of being fully present and connecting. When people

It’s interesting that when asked to share photos of their children helping, most parents selected pictures of home cooking projects. I was happy to see that many of the children exhibiting cooking skills were quite young. When it comes to encouraging children as helpers in the kitchen or any other environment, starting at an early age is important. A three-year-old is excited to learn how to slice a banana or a stalk of celery. An eight-year-old who hasn’t been taught how to

The term "my new best friend" popped into our culture as the title of a British comedy series. (Didn’t we always use this phrase?) The popularity of the phrase, offers an insightful, positive perspective on relationships in this 21 st century. At the time this idiom emerged, a New York Times article explored the idea that, with the modern tendency of children to spend most of the day in groups, finding an enduring best friend for your child may be an antiquated concept. The

Standing in the hall, an elementary schooler was looking down at a group of preschoolers in the yard below playing musical instruments at top volume. I noticed the boy was holding his ears as he looked on, and I asked what he thought of the music. I was surprised that instead of saying, “They’re playing way too loud,” he said, "I have very sensitive ears so I can’t stay and listen.” He turned and walked toward the playground. How wonderful that at a young age this boy knew en

Can children learn to be creative from their school community? The answer is yes, and at The Meher Schools we are interested in fostering original thinking throughout the year. Halloween Halloween is just one example. On Friday our annual parade showcased adults and children using imagination to transform themselves. There was fourth grade and drama teacher Amy Weinstein dressed as her dog, Pete, and Pete dressed as Amy, and art teacher Lara Cannon dressed as her version of a

In this age of succinct emails and text messages, the value of handwritten notes is not lost—especially between parents and children. Parents often place sweet messages in their children’s lunchboxes, providing a nurturing moment of their presence with the good food. Writing letters can also help us communicate with children when spoken words might fall short or might not have the desired results. An apology letter to an older child after an upsetting situation can inspire re

With darkness wrapping around us earlier each evening, autumn invites us to more and better sleep. Experts say fall’s cool air is the most conducive to refreshing sleep. Snoozing more helps us respond to the quick temperature changes and more purposeful activity of fall. More sleep also helps maintain strong immune systems. On the other hand, not getting enough sleep compromises adults and children mentally and physically. Many of the challenges we fret about with children re

I recently had fun seeing the new Superman movie with my grandson. Who wouldn’t fall in love with Superman’s dog, Krypto, and the adorable way he knocks over his master and smothers him with kisses? However, (spoiler alert) when Superman’s arch enemy, Lex Luthor, uses DNA to create a clone designed to fight Superman to the death, I had big feelings. I desperately wanted Superman to pulverize his look-alike, and watching them fight made me feel empowered. If I had on a Superma

Increasingly, our students are becoming global travelers. Instead of telling us they went to Tahoe or Disneyland, they mention that their...

Room 1 teacher Chris Cameron called me aside last week to tell me about a touching situation with one of the four-year-olds in his class....

Our school librarian, Mari Ponghamsing, asked children to create bookmarks that illustrate important rules about caring for books. She...

Rosangela Snavely is on the big playground teaching children to jump rope. This game is unfamiliar to most children today, and she...

The setting: Fourth graders visiting first graders are doing a “getting to know you” art project together. Each fourth- and first-grade...

During set-up week, while our teachers attend meetings and get their classrooms ready to welcome students for the new school year, our...

Arriving at school one day, a girl pointed to another child and told her mother, “She’s a baby. She doesn’t know how to talk.” The mom,...